For me, two of the biggest misconceptions / assumptions about gender-fluidity are firstly that its something new, secondly all people that cross-dress are gender-fluid. I reiterate what I have said in previous posts, being genderqueer is more about thoughts and feelings than appearance. Sure people that describe themselves as Genderqueer / gender-fluid can and do wear clothes from both male and female wardrobes, but they don’t have to, there are no rules. Society is always very very slow to realise this. For example even in our so called ‘enlightened’ times many still hang on the idea that gays and lesbians can only sound or act a certain way.
It would be fair to say that it is our assumptions that hold our world back and keep our minds closed. It is often the case that even those that claim to fight for freedom and equality are just as quick to pass assumptions on others when it comes to how they look. Clothes, makeup, nail/ hair length and even the colours they wear are used to often wrongly pigeonhole and discredit people. These assumption are really outdated rude and sexist. FYI Women that attack other women because they make a living off their appearance are just as sexist as any man.
The guy that rolls down the window to wolf whistle the sexy long haired blonde in the tight jeans only to discover, in fact it is a male heavy metal fan bears out that our limited view of the world is deeply flawed. Our small minded judgements are the same reason true equality is still decades off.
Sure gender-fluid sounds strange and sadly derives much ridicule, the name may be new, but the feeling of being gender-fluid has always been with us . Think about it, not all those bullied Sissy boys and Tomboy girls of the last century grew out of it, nor did they identify as, or become gay or lesbian. They were the others, the outcasts without a label, who felt and expressed life differently because human experiences simply aren’t or have never been that cut and dry.
So when you see a beautiful girl who is ‘obviously’ a boy, a strong looking man who is ‘obviously’ a girl, don’t assume anything about their sex or gender. If you do you will probably not only be wrong, but also even if you have the best intentions cause embarrassment and offence. This stuff is difficult for all of us, we can feel like we are all walking on egg shells, but if we take it slow we can start up meaningful dialogues with each other. If you don’t know if someone is a he/she/they etc, then simple smile and say hello how are you or hello how can I help you. Be friendly, be nice and assume nothing.